I’ve been recording a new song “R U?” this week. The process of recording always puts my music under a microscope, brings me face to face with the words I wrote and commits me to them. Songs are always morphing and changing each time we play them, but now this is the version that people will hear the most. This is the snapshot that will represent the song more often than not, and so it is an opportunity to present the truest essence of the piece.
This song is about finding community with those who are walking in the same direction, the people whose inner and outer work reflects a commitment to the best parts of humanity – our courage, compassion, learning from our mistakes and moving towards a more equitable and just society. In the second chorus, there is a line that refers to “[those] who gave up being nice, so that they could be kind.” It’s a line that felt inherently right, but one that I wasn’t sure I could totally explain if pressed. It was a felt sense of what those words mean to me, in my own life and in surveying the current landscape. It’s a line I have questioned because that “feeling” is not a concrete and defendable thing, because I’ve struggled to tie it directly to the rest of the song – but regardless, I recorded myself singing those words.
This morning I read something that immediately validated this line and added valuable context:
“Nice people made the best Nazis.
Or so I have been told. My mother was born in Munich in 1934, and spent her childhood in Nazi Germany surrounded by nice people who refused to make waves. When things got ugly, the people my mother lived alongside chose not to focus on ‘politics,’ instead busying themselves with happier things. They were lovely, kind people who turned their heads as their neighbors were dragged away.” – Naomi Shulman
Full piece at https://www.wbur.org/cognoscenti/2016/11/17/the-post-election-case-for-speaking-out-naomi-shulman
What is the value of being “nice” to those among us who are fearing for their safety? What is the value of being apolitical to those whose existence is politicized? “Nice” is the privilege of being able to avoid conflict when you yourself are not under fire. “Nice” is apolitical by design, a socially reinforced mask that enables mass cruelty and oppression, a badge of our “goodness” we fear being revoked if we speak out.
“Kind” goes deeper. “Kind” is who we are when no one is watching, and does not waver no matter who is. “Kind” is refusing to obey orders that demand we sacrifice one another on the basis of fear and hatred. “Kind” is inherently disruptive in a society that routinely dehumanizes and devalues our neighbors and communities.
There are as many ways to resist as there are each of us. Whatever you do, wherever you are, my wish for you is to be guided by kindness, and know that you are not alone.
“‘Cause I keep my circle tight with those who fight to hear the voices being erased,
Who gave up being nice, so that they could be kind,
Who are no longer living by the fear
That came from someone else’s mind.” – “R U?” Anna Spackman 2025
Watch a clip: https://youtube.com/shorts/6g-pvOpOMgw?si=spWJk3Acrs4MJ2UP
Upcoming shows:
Saturday 2/15, 7-9 pm: Kings Tavern (previously advertised as 8-10, sorry!)
Saturday 3/29, 7 pm: “Sunlight Returning” at The Gem. Tickets:
